Five Signs that Show the Online Magazine You are Reading is Wasting your Time

1. Memes or Gifs are used as a form of content. If you notice a post that utilizes memes as a substitute for words, or gifs in place of paragraphs, or any kind of photo slide-show with minimal text,you’re probably in the digital presence of a magazine that does not employ writers and has nothing original to say; usually posts are done by ‘internet intellectuals,’ which is really just another phrase to describe someone with an opinion and online access or a hipster in a liberal arts college. Yes, a picture is a thousand words, but that doesn’t work when a grade school-simple thought is superimposed upon it.  


2. The "articles" are 300 words or less. Certainly there is a difference between a post, a blog, and an article. If you are reading a post that self identifies as an article and gets a point across in less than 300 words, it’s probably a regurgitated opinion copied and pasted from various other sources on the internet. More than likely it has no data behind it, no reflection, or thought, or depth. Some pieces manage to make a complete travesty of themselves by going a whopping 500 words and saying absolutely nothing of value. Similarly, magazines that treat “List Articles” (such as the one you are reading right now) as serious content or most of their content should also be suspect.

 (Shall I note that this is not a serious post? Should I also note the category titled: Shit Talking the Elephant?I will note nothing, this is the internet, you’re on your own.)


3. The Article Title Perfectly Summarizes the Piece, making the rest of the text redundant. If before you start reading you already know exactly what the argument/main point is, don’t even bother. You're better off reading someone's status update. Similarly, if the article title begins with "Why" as if it is answering a question, don't bother to read it. Chances are they are answering a question you never ever asked or considered or care to know the answer to.


4. No Comments section on the site. A magazine without a comments section in 2015 indicates a publication that is afraid of dialogue.  It is through comment sections that you may  ask for the sources to their ‘articles’.  The sources are not needed to verify their non-argument, but rather, to allow you to read what they were trying to say in a more thoughtful manner.  That is, to read their opinion from someone who actually believes it.   


5.  If given enough time apes could write the complete works of Shakespeare, what does it say if the article you are reading could be written by apes in  roughly four months?  That is to say, if aping other magazines minus the sources, research, and insight is a particular magazine’s idea of an article, then you must question whether the unthinking and absurd article was, in fact, written by apes.  

Mari Gomez2 Comments